The series premiere of one of the worst titled shows this season.
The show starts with them the couple, Mel and Sam, planning a weekend to meet her parents. He is recording a message on the answering machine, where he leaves a message announcing that they are going out of town to visit her parents to tell them they are getting married because she's pregnant. She stops him to argue the finer points of their day and are interrupted by the phone ringing, guess who? Her dad. They scramble to find the phone before he gets the message.
She is leaving earlier in the day, because he has to stay behind for a company party. Girlfriend is reminding him how important the night is, while the boyfriend is getting hit on by a co-worker.
Next scene shows him leaving the bar, and almost getting hit by the woman who was hitting on him. He decides to "see her home" because she is super drunk. He gets into a cab with her and oops she barfs on him, while on the way to meet the parents. Cabbie gets upset and dumps them in the middle of nowhere, and now she's six miles from home, drunk and passed out, he decides to drag her, in the rain. Now he's barfed on, wet and late. Dinner is over and he's in the shower in the aprtment of weird woman and there are no towels, anywhere. She's still passed out. He's naked, she wakes up screaming. Now he's outside wet and naked, digging through the trash. His phone is on the inside of drunk girls apartment. He wraps himself in a trash bag and high tails it to the parents house. In a trash bag diaper, and asks 'dad' to pay for $80 cab ride. He lies about the whole ordeal.
Then the lights go out. Breaker trips, Sam has to go to the bathroom, but being unfamiliar with the parents house, accidentally goes to the the kitchen, and when I say goes to, I mean goes in. He pees on the birthday dinner duck, and gets caught when the lights come on. Spills the pee pot and when dad returns, he slips and falls in it.
Next morning at the parents house, Sam and Mel discuss the "announcement" Mel is upset with the incident the night before. She teases him and he says "shut up or I'll punch you in the face." Right when mom and dad return from the ER. Dad has a concussion but decides to go about his day. Dad gets a little dizzy and falls in down in front, of all places, a funeral home.
The funeral home director then calls the house, who picks up? That's right, Sam. The funeral home guy tells him that "judge Clayton collapsed in the street."
Sam then tells his girlfriend and her mom that "Dick's dead." Which of course he's not. He just collapsed. A whole comedy conundrum. Mom is upset that Sam killed Dick.
Sam goes to identify the body, and finds the Dad's glasses. Never actually seeing the body, identifies it by the glasses on the table. Which of course were forgotten by Dick when he left.
Sam then has to call Mel's brother in Nairobi. A bad connection causes Sam to have to yell. "Your Dad is dead" about a thousand times. Upsetting Mom, who now needs her valium scrip refilled. Rushing to the pharmacy, Sam hits Dick's car and the airbag causes him to pass out. Sam then drags Dad's lifeless body into the house where Mom freaks and faints.
OK so Dad is alive. Mel declares her love for Sam, even though he has his doubts about how well he fits in the family. While they are discussing it the lights go out again. Sam goes to fix it and starts a fire. Burning up the mothers birthday gift to her husband. A portrait that took over a year to paint.
That's it for this week. Actually, based on that.... that's it for this series.
CSI Miami 9-22-08
Blogged while I watched.
OK I don't care about the bodybag, H is not dead. The whole show revolves around David Caruso's bad acting. Also, CSI Wolf now has the ability to declare someone dead and release a crime scene without the medical examiner. Haha - not buying it.
Ha - was right. Calleigh and Delko following the trail find a text that leads them to CSI Wolf. Yep Wolf fesses up, he was following orders from H to fake his assassination so he could get the new fangled bullets off the street. Way to hold out CSI Wolf.
Ortega was the bad guy who wanted H dead. So they try to intimidate this world reknown drug bad guy by driving him through gang territory in the front seat of a police car. Can anyone say "escape"?
Yep, bullets start flying. Women start screaming. Delko goes to save a woman from a burning car. Frank tells bad guy to "stay here" - Hello? Really? Guess who gets away...Oh yeah the bad guy in the car.
Meanwhile, across the world somewhere H is meeting with other bad guys who he's helped, his family which is supposed to be in Puerto Rico, and with Yelena, his sister-in-law/love interest. Buying all the magic bullets off the streets. Mmmm hmmm. But wait, 20 minutes later H is back in Miami meeting with Delko. Hello?
I can't believe I'm watching this. It is sooooo stupid. H is supposed to be dead yet he's walking around the Police station. Meanwhile, Yelena is being held at gunpoint by another bad guy, but gets out of it by making a deal. And not so subtly nodding to H who is also there.
How long can this series last? Really. Even its absurdity has become a bore.
Oh wait, luckily with all of that shooting they found one speck of blood, on a white parking lot line, then another, apparently white parking lot lines attract individual drops of blood.
Does anyone else know that H is still alive, or did we just forget that we are supposed to be investigating his fake death?
Oh but wait, another clue, leading to Nate - the ex boyfriend of Calleigh, and she gets to interview him. Yes, no conflict of interest there. This guy who just left, probably last Tuesday, is deep undercover in the most notorious gang in Miami? Mmm hmmm.
Yelena is following the bad guy(also H's babymama's husband) who is buying all the magic bullets. The bad guys still think that H is dead. Guess they aren't as smart as the good guys. . I do like their computer geeky thing. Miami has to be the smallest town on the planet. Or the police station is centrally located to every place because no matter where the bad guy is it's a 20 second drive. "The bad guy is at the airport - go" and before the bad guy can fly off in his private plane the entire MDPD has their guns trained on him. Bravo.
Calleighs bfriend shows up in the lab. Yes, undercover gang members can walk up into a police lab without notice. Oh he did it for love, he did it for Calleigh. She squeaks out a weak "thank you" and he announces that he's "reassigned" for six months or so, but hoping that she'll wait for him. She doesn't know if she can, she's scared. loveyabye.
H's babymama and her bad guy husband meet up to sail off into the sunset. He thinks H is dead, but H shows up to shoot him. And he tries to get away. H shoots a propane tank and blows up the 100 ft yacht. But wait - they can't find the body.
H puts on his sunglasses and walks away saying the cheesiest of lines. Ah - the formula.
OK I don't care about the bodybag, H is not dead. The whole show revolves around David Caruso's bad acting. Also, CSI Wolf now has the ability to declare someone dead and release a crime scene without the medical examiner. Haha - not buying it.
Ha - was right. Calleigh and Delko following the trail find a text that leads them to CSI Wolf. Yep Wolf fesses up, he was following orders from H to fake his assassination so he could get the new fangled bullets off the street. Way to hold out CSI Wolf.
Ortega was the bad guy who wanted H dead. So they try to intimidate this world reknown drug bad guy by driving him through gang territory in the front seat of a police car. Can anyone say "escape"?
Yep, bullets start flying. Women start screaming. Delko goes to save a woman from a burning car. Frank tells bad guy to "stay here" - Hello? Really? Guess who gets away...Oh yeah the bad guy in the car.
Meanwhile, across the world somewhere H is meeting with other bad guys who he's helped, his family which is supposed to be in Puerto Rico, and with Yelena, his sister-in-law/love interest. Buying all the magic bullets off the streets. Mmmm hmmm. But wait, 20 minutes later H is back in Miami meeting with Delko. Hello?
I can't believe I'm watching this. It is sooooo stupid. H is supposed to be dead yet he's walking around the Police station. Meanwhile, Yelena is being held at gunpoint by another bad guy, but gets out of it by making a deal. And not so subtly nodding to H who is also there.
How long can this series last? Really. Even its absurdity has become a bore.
Oh wait, luckily with all of that shooting they found one speck of blood, on a white parking lot line, then another, apparently white parking lot lines attract individual drops of blood.
Does anyone else know that H is still alive, or did we just forget that we are supposed to be investigating his fake death?
Oh but wait, another clue, leading to Nate - the ex boyfriend of Calleigh, and she gets to interview him. Yes, no conflict of interest there. This guy who just left, probably last Tuesday, is deep undercover in the most notorious gang in Miami? Mmm hmmm.
Yelena is following the bad guy(also H's babymama's husband) who is buying all the magic bullets. The bad guys still think that H is dead. Guess they aren't as smart as the good guys. . I do like their computer geeky thing. Miami has to be the smallest town on the planet. Or the police station is centrally located to every place because no matter where the bad guy is it's a 20 second drive. "The bad guy is at the airport - go" and before the bad guy can fly off in his private plane the entire MDPD has their guns trained on him. Bravo.
Calleighs bfriend shows up in the lab. Yes, undercover gang members can walk up into a police lab without notice. Oh he did it for love, he did it for Calleigh. She squeaks out a weak "thank you" and he announces that he's "reassigned" for six months or so, but hoping that she'll wait for him. She doesn't know if she can, she's scared. loveyabye.
H's babymama and her bad guy husband meet up to sail off into the sunset. He thinks H is dead, but H shows up to shoot him. And he tries to get away. H shoots a propane tank and blows up the 100 ft yacht. But wait - they can't find the body.
H puts on his sunglasses and walks away saying the cheesiest of lines. Ah - the formula.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
